■Where & When?

There are some points to consider when planning the venue and date of the wedding ceremony. Do you want to be married in the eyes of God? Is the marriage based on religious grounds? You may consider a civil ceremony, perhaps followed by a blessing, if you have no religious beliefs.

If you are planning a church wedding, you’d better firstly check availability (and their willingness to marry you) as soon as possible. You should also check availability if you’re planning a summer and/or Saturday ceremonies—and book early. If you plan a mid-week ceremony, you are most likely to book the venue of your choice and be closer to your original date. Of course there is a disadvantage with a mid-week ceremony, guests may have to organize days off work and therefore it is likely less people will be able to attend.

■Church Service

When setting your budget, don’t forget that church will charge for the service, the choir, the organist, and so on. You need to discuss your arrangements with the vicar/priest who will happily assist with your choice of readings, hymns and orders of service. The church will usually suggest a rehearsal (or two) a couple of weeks before the big day. They will also advise you on the maximum number of guests that can attend the ceremony.

Traditionally, the two families are seated either side of the aisle. This might date back to the time where the bride herself would be a peace offering in an attempt to unite two tribes. Often someone would show their disapproval, so the two tribes were separated to avoid possible conflict.

A Catholic church ceremony is sometimes performed two parts. The first part is the main marriage ceremony—a religious uniting of husband and wife, including hymns, readings, prayer and legal and civil responsibilities. The second part usually takes place when both the bride and groom are practicing Catholics. This involves the partaking of Holy Communion. The Catholic church does not usually charge for the priest’s time. However, an envelope containing a small donation is often given to the priest after service. The flowers used to decorate church are also left as a token of thanks.

■Registry Office

Civil weddings are proving and more popular than ever these days. It is recommended to check availability and book as soon as possible. However, civil weddings cannot usually be booked earlier than 3 months before the day. The bride and groom need to have lived in the country for at least seven days before giving notice. If the couple live in different districts, they must notify the both districts of their intended wedding. If the bride and groom wish to marry in different district from where they both live, they should contact the register of the district where their marriage is planed. Both must give notice independently and in person. There is a fee for each notice.

You should firstly decide whether you prefer to marry in at a licensed venue or in a registry office. When choosing the date, remember that the summer months and Saturday in particular are the most popular, so availability may be limited. You shouldn’t contact the register until a date has been decided on and confirmed as being available. Make clear how much notice is needed, and some original documents such as birth certificate might be required when you give notice of intended marriage.

There are no set rules on dress. The bride and groom decide how formal the dress code will be. The registrar may advise you on the arrangements for photographs, music and the maximum number of guests. Remember that the registrar will have other weddings to perform on the day, so ensure you and your guests arrive in plenty of time.

■The Service

After the bride and groom have confirmed all the details to the registrar, the guests will be called upon and the service will begin. The bride and the groom will then be asked to confirm that they are both legally allowed to marry.

■Declaration

I do solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I (their name) may not be joined in matrimony to (their partner’s name). Or: I declare that I know of no legal reason why I (their name) may not be joined in marriage to (their partner’s name). Or: By replying “I am” when asked “Are you (their name) free lawfully to marry (their partner’s name)?”

The exchanging of vows and rings then takes place, after which the registrar will record the marriage. The bride, groom and witnesses are asked to check and sign the register, and the registrar will sign and issue the certificate to the bride. In the United States, the ceremony lasts approximately 30 minutes.

■Licensed Wedding Venue

There are thousands of licensed wedding venues in Occident today. Many of these venues offer the complete wedding services, usually including accommodation and reception. Couples are able to compose their own vows, assuming they meet the legal requirements. Because every venue has to renew their license, it is worth checking that they still hold their license before deciding on a venue.

In some Occidental nations, the law does not allow civil weddings to be held in marquees, trains, boats or in the open air. Civil marriages can not be held in buildings that have any religious connection, either past or present.