佚名/Anonymous

My friend John always has something to tell me. He knows so much that young men have to have older and more worldly wise men to tell them. For instance who to trust, how to care for others, and how to live life to the fullest.

Recently, John lost his wife Janet. For eight years. She fought against cancer, but in the end her sickness had the last word. One day John took out a folded piece of paper from his wallet. He had found it, so he told me, when he tidied up some drawers at home. It was a small love letter Janet had written. The note could look like a school girl’s scrawls about her dream guy. All that was missing was a drawing of a heart with the names John and Janet written in it. But the small letter was written by a woman who had had seven children; a woman who fought for her life and who probably only had a few months left to live. It was also a beautiful recipe for how to keep a marriage together.

Janet’s description of her husband begins thus:“Loved me. Took care of me. Worried about me.”Even though John always had a ready answer, he never joked about cancer apparently. Sometimes he came home in the evening to find Janet in the middle of one of those depressions cancer patients so often get. In no time he got her into the car and drove her to her favorite’s restaurant.

He showed consideration for her, and she knew it. You cannot hide something for someone who knows better.“Helped me when I was ill.”the next line reads. Perhaps Janet wrote this while the cancer was in one of the horrible and wonderful lulls. Where everything is—almost—as it used to be, before the sickness broke out, and where it doesn’t hurt to hope that everything is over, maybe forever.

“Forgave me a lot.”“Stood by my side.”And a piece of good advice for everyone who looks on giving constructive criticism as a kind of sacred duty“Always praising.”“Made sure I had everything I needed.”she goes on to write.

After that she has turned over the paper and added:“Warmth. Humur. Kindness. Thoughtfulness.”And then she writes about the husband she has lived with and loved the most of her life:“Always there for me when I needed you.”The last words she wrote sum up all the others. I can see her for me when she adds thoughtfully:“Good friend.”

I stand beside John now, and cannot even pretend to know how it feels to lose someone who is as close to me as Janet was to him. I need to hear what he has to say much more than he needs to talk.

“John,”I ask.“How do you stick together with someone through 38 years—not to mention the sickness? How do I know if I can bear to stand by my wife’s side if she becomes sick One day?”

“You can,”he says quietly.“If you love her enough, you can.”

我的朋友约翰总会对我有所教导。对于年轻人需要接受阅历丰富的长者或英明睿智之人的教诲，他深信不疑。如：哪些人可以信任，如何去照顾别人，如何使生活更充实，等等。

约翰的妻子珍妮特刚刚去世不久。八年来，她一直在与癌症抗争，最终还是走到了生命的尽头。一天，约翰告诉我，他在整理家里的抽屉时，发现了一封小小的情书，那是珍妮特亲笔写下的。他从钱夹里拿出一张折起来的纸条让我看。除了没有画一个写着他俩名字的心形图案外，这封情书简直就像是一位憧憬着白马王子的女学生的涂鸦之作。不过别忘了，写这封情书的人可是一位有七个孩子的妈妈，一个为生命苦苦挣扎的病人，一位或许只有数月生命的女人。

对于维持美好婚姻来说，这封情书同样是一剂灵丹妙药。“爱我，照顾我，关心我。”珍妮特在开头这样描写丈夫。尽管约翰思维敏捷，他开玩笑时总会对癌症的话题避而不谈，但是，有时他傍晚回到家，就会发现珍妮特的情绪很低落——这也是癌症病人经常都会有的情况。在这种情况下，他就会立刻开车带她去她最喜爱的餐馆。

他对她悉心呵护，她对此心照不宣——对于一个了解一切的人，你很难隐瞒住什么。接下来的一行写着：“在我生病的时候帮助我。”也许写这些文字时，珍妮特正处于特别恐怖的发病间歇期间。这是癌症发作前的平静，此时希望一切都会过去，也许是希望永远地过去。

“总是给予我原谅。”“一直在支持我。”下面这句可以作为对总爱批评的人的神圣建议：“始终赞美。”她还写道：“满足我的一切需求。”

写完这些，她又在纸的背面补充道：“温暖，幽默，善良，体贴。”她最后用一句话作了总结：“在我需要的时候，他总会在身边。”这一切都是在写同她一起生活，爱了她大半辈子的丈夫。她还深情地加了一句：“好朋友。”我知道这是为我写的。

我站在约翰身边，珍妮特与约翰是如此密不可分，我根本无法假装自己了解那种失去至爱的痛苦。于是，我很想知道约翰在想些什么。

“约翰，”我问，“你如何做到的？你们一起生活了38年，你却丝毫没提过她的病情。假如有一天我妻子病了，我不知道自己能否忍受在她身边生活。”

“你会的，”约翰平静地说，“只要你深爱着她，你就可以忍受。”

心灵小语

每当我们怀疑真爱已死时，总会有这样那样真实的例子，让我们为之潸然泪下。《圣经》上说“爱是恒久忍耐”，无论是肉体的痛苦，还是心灵的痛苦，在这样伟大的爱情面前，都无法成为阻碍。

worldly adj.世间的；世俗的；善于处世的

例 What is the truest affection in the world?

世间最真挚的情感是什么？

description n.叙述；记述；描写；描述；形容；刻画

例 The West Lake was beautiful beyond description.

西湖美得难以描述。

criticism n.批评；评论；挑剔；指责

例 If children live with criticism, they learn to condemn.

当孩子们生活在批判中，他们会学会苛责。thoughtfulness adj.关切的；体贴的；考虑周到的

例 Your thoughtfulness should not go unrepaid.

您的体贴关怀一定会得到回报。

对于年轻人需要接受阅历丰富的长者或英明睿智之人的教诲，他深信不疑。

译___________________________________________________________________

对于维持美好婚姻来说，这封情书同样是一剂灵丹妙药。

译___________________________________________________________________

“你会的，”约翰平静地说，“只要你深爱着她，你就可以忍受。”

译___________________________________________________________________

For instance who to trust.

for instance：例如；比如；举例来说

造___________________________________________________________________

Even though John always had a ready answer.

even though：即使；纵然；尽管；虽然；甚至

造___________________________________________________________________