“Deeds are clothes of the heart”,said by Francis Bacon.Graceful postures are indeed beautiful,charming and affecting,and they are reflections of good manners and sublimity.

Postures mainly contain sitting,standing and walking.

■Sitting Posture

One of the first things a person must learn is to sit properly when appearing for an interview or other formal occasions.When you are in a sitting position,your hands are particularly important, because they more often than not,pose a problem if you are not well-versed in knowing how to do with them.The way of putting out hands may reflect the quality of your character and nature.You may very well find your hands getting in the way of presenting a calm front,if you are a nervous disposition.Sometimes your nervousness or tension may be observed from the tremor,slight or noticeable,through your hands.Therefore,you have to learn how to place your hands properly either on the arms of the chair,on your lap or on the table in front of you.

Legs are next in importance.Legs have also to fall in place to give the man the required composure and self-assurance.Shaking the legs or making other movements while seated may make the vibrations to your whole body,making the others uncomfortable.Therefore “sitting pretty” is not just a phrase that is to be bypassed but practised with spirit to bring about the best result.Also,you should bear in mind that the art of sitting is not an end in itself because you may have to continue the conversation in this position,and while you may have presented a good picture while sitting,you should pay attention that this picture is not adversely influenced when you start talking.You must talk without in any way disrupting your sitting position and make sure that you can talk happily and concentrate on the talk without letting others’ pay attention to your sitting position.

It is likely that a person may fail to talk at ease without disturbing his/her sitting posture if the person is self-conscious.Slight body movements including hands and feet may not be noticed as long as he/she talks,if such movements are well-synchronized and project his/her personality to advantage.These movements may help to promote the conversation and may be quite suitable to his/her smoking,his/her laughter and his/her show of wonderment.However,the person concerned should be at rest once his/her own words end,just as the dancer stops with the stopping of music.The person must also manage his/her smiles,acknowledgements,nods and so on even with his/her sitting position,and his/her sitting position has to be combined with all these reactions.

Therefore,you may display your self-confidence or its lack from the very position you adopt when you are sitting.Those in command may have their heads in the air,their chests puffed out and their legs crossed at outstandingly protruding angles.The opposite of this may be observed from the bowed head and shoulders,hands between knees,and feet flat on the floor.But between these two extremes,there is a normal manner of sitting which does not give conspicuous airs this way or that.You’d better adopt the manner of keeping yourself in your seat and avoid any show-off or any cowering.

An elegant sitting posture reflects calmness,serenity and seriousness.It is an important statement of one’s manners.

◆ A good sitting posture should be:

◇Walk in light and leisurely steps to the seat.Sit from the left side quietly and steadily.Place the feet naturally.A lady should slightly hold her skirt under her thighs when sitting.

◇Sit with a straight back and push chests forward.Lean the upper body slightly with center of gravity uprightly down.Eyes look forward,smiling.Slightly close the lips and hold the chin a little inward.

◇Hold the two knees slightly separated or together.One can lean to one side depending on the situation.

◇Place two feet evenly,with both hands naturally placed on the knees or the chair arms.Usually don’t place one leg on another.

◇Draw the right foot backward first,then stand up and steadily leave the seat.

◆ But avoid:

◇Separating the two legs and stretching them out.(Rough)

◇Hooking the chair with one foot or hiding feet under the seat.(Boorish and low-class)

◇Moving back and forth while sitting;consistently switching positions from left to right.(Underbred)

◇Crossing the legs in a “4” shape,with two hands catching the upper leg,shaking foot top.(Impolite and cocky)

◇Sitting or standing up violently and making loud noises.(Underbred)

In fact,it is very simple to sit elegantly whether in an evening gown or in jeans.The basic steps are as follows:

◇Walk toward the chair or couch and stand directly in front of it.

◇Feel the chair gently with your leg without looking backwards or down,back up slightly towards the chair.

◇Then,sit down gently onto the front of the chair,keeping your back straight.

◇Slide back onto the seat a little more,but keeping your feet on the floor.

◇Keep your knees together.You can tuck one foot behind the other or keep your ankles together.Feet can be slightly to the side.

◇Uncross your ankles,place your feet flat in front of you to stand up.Slide forward until you are at the edge of the chair.Keeping your back straight,stand up.

■Standing Posture

Sometimes,standing is harder than sitting.One of the reasons for this is that standing causes more strain,whether it is prolonged or otherwise,and a person is more vulnerable when standing than when sitting.The various lines of a standing person’s body containing the cut of his/her clothes are in sharp focus to the viewer,and he/she may not be in a comfortable position all the time to vindicate his/her claim to good manners.But on the other hand,a standing person may feel that it is easier to keep himself/herself in control and confidence than when being seated.This is also the case when a person is used to standing—like guards,speakers,teachers, and so on.At the same time,there are others,like receptionists,waiters,etc,who may have to practise the art of standing since this pertains to their profession.However,the interviewee has to know how to stand correctly for being observed before being asked to have his/her seat.

A person may adopt different modes of standing,for example,standing straight with his/her hands on both sides,or with feet a little apart with his/her hands locked behind or crossed in front of the body; or a little bowing or stooping as a mark of respect etc.Some people would like to stand with their fists on their waist,and it is needless to say that this is the worst form of standing and it proves that the person has no manners at all.It shows apparent disrespect and an indifferent attitude to others to stand with hands on the waist,and it should be avoided on formal occasions.People should try to practise a natural way of standing,with the hands hanging loosely at the sides.However,it would be better to adopt a posture of readiness instead of one of absolute composure and complacence when a person is doing with or looking after or taking care of a VIP.

When a person is in a conversation with other people and both are standing,it is necessary that both of them should pay full attention to each other and should not have their attention distracted by other things.While two people are wrapt in a conversation,they present a beautiful picture and both these people will look impressive to others.Of course,if one of them is the host at a ceremony and is responsible of welcoming or seeing to the convenience of many people at the same time,it may be permissible for him/her to look hither and thither or distract his/her attention while in conversation.Regularly,it seems better for a person to be attentive to the conversation in progress when he/she is talking in a standing position.Thus he/she should do sincerely without giving a self-conscious or arrogant impression.

An elegant standing posture shows a person’s good manners and gentle style.Standing still,stretching out of the body,presenting an attractive outline and showing a positive spirit are the basic requirements.

◆ A good standing posture should be:

◇Even shoulders,straight neck,slightly hold the chin inward; stand with both eyes looking forward,smiling brightly.

◇Stand with arms naturally down and fingers naturally drooping; you can cross your two hands in front of the body,usually right hand covering left hand with elbows a little bowed outward.When it is necessary,you may place one hand or both hands behind your back.

◇Standing still,pushing chest forward,drawing the abdomen inward,and slightly holding the hips up.

◇Your two legs should stand straight with knees relaxed and thighs held up slightly; the center of gravity should be placed on the front foot.

◇Stand with two feet separated; distance between the feet should be the same as the shoulder; one foot might withdraw a small pace with the upper part holding still.

◇Women’s feet should be placed in the shape of “V”; holding knees and heels together,and lifting the center of gravity high possibly.

◆ But avoid:

◇Shaking any part of the body.(Careless)

◇Standing with two arms or one arm akimbo.(Offensive)

◇Standing with two arms crossed.(Positive,defensive)

◇Standing with two legs crossed.(Too casual).

◇Putting two hands in pockets.(Frivolous or restrained; if it is necessary,you can put one hand in front pocket)

■Walking Posture

A graceful walk will help you look more confident and beautiful than anything else.Walking beautifully begins with perfect posture.An elegant walk should be effortless and smooth.However,few of us have been taught how to walk gracefully; we usually stork around,mince,or just our heads out unbecomingly.It is possible to greatly improve your grace and posture by following the guidelines given bellow:

Bring your shoulders gently down and back while squeezing in your abdominal muscles.Carry your hands softly with the pads of your index fingers touching to the tips of your thumbs,and permitting the thumbs to brush the sides of your thighs.

Fix your gaze on your destination and determine your trajectory before you start to walk.Watch out any obstacles in your way.Keep your gaze lifted as you walk; avoid staring at your feet.

Don’t mince your step or over-stride when you start to walk.In other words,don’t take too small or too large steps.Let your stride start at the place where your thighs meet your hips.When your feet meet the ground,land with your heel pressing into the ground and roll forward onto the ball of your foot.

Don’t walk too slowly or too quickly; step at a medium pace and always walk with purpose.Practise walking with a book on top of your head in order to improve your walking grace and balance.It is a simple,old-fashioned exercise,but it is really effective.

Why the book on your head? Because many of us walk or sit with our chins sticking out.It can re-teach your muscle memory and stop you from the dreaded neck droop by carrying a book on your head.Touch a hand to the back of your head and guide it gently backward an inch or two to correct this unfortunate posture.Keep you chin parallel to the floor; that is,level,not tucked in or sticking up.

Walking postures are the most noticeable body language in public places.They are the best expressions of one’s vigor and grace,too.

◆ A good walking posture should be:

◇Steady steps,natural paces with rhythms.Woman’s skirt will move with footsteps.

◇Holding upper torso still,raising head and leveling the chin with the ground.Look forward with a bright smile.

◇Slightly forward center of gravity.

◇Walking with two hands gently swinging with 10-15-degree angle between the arms and the body.

◇Step equally,with one or a half foot distance between the two feet.

◇Top of the foot can be slightly outward,but tops and heels should be parallel.

◇Step up and down with straight upper part,also with light and steady steps.

◇Use waist when walking,hold the waist tight.

◇Generally, do not put one hand on the handrail.

◆ But avoid:

◇Shaking of body.(Frivolous)

◇Taking steps too large or too small.(Strained)

◇Walking with two hands crossed on the back,palms up.(Stiff)